Not the Best Eternity...

Hell. It is not flames engulfing me for an eternity. It is not some fallen angel prodding me with a trident. It is not some special ring of torture god would prescribe for me. It is everything and nothing. It is endless pain and the lack of feeling. It is the antithesis of experience, yet the worst of them all.

As I first descend into Hell I am blasted by burning, unrelenting light. It burns every part of my being, searing me to my very core. Hotter and brighter than the largest forge, I am melted into a body of pain. At the same time, my eardrums seem to shatter as a sound wave louder and deeper than any heard on earth reaches my ears. My whole body shakes violently as it overpowers me. My skin is being torn off; slowly, brutally, down to the bone. The worst imaginable combination of stench and taste causes me to vomit up acid from my stomach, constantly replenished as necessary.


True sensory overload slowly destroys me. Just as I feel like I am numbing to the pain, it renews its vigor. I cannot take it. I beg and beg for it to stop, and just as I think I can take it no longer, it stops. I thank God, Satan, anybody who I think would listen. I relax and wonder what comes next, is that all? My body does not seem to be functioning, I cannot feel, see, smell, taste or hear anything. After days of patient waiting  for my senses to come back, I come to a horrifying conclusion: they are not coming back. There is no change, there is nothing. My mind is left to wander. Days turn to weeks, weeks to months, but before years I begin to lose my sense of time completely. The darkness, the nothingness itself begins to burn. I realize my thoughts are no longer normal, my consciousness is dying. Not only are my senses dead, by my sanity is dying quickly.

I long for anything, even that overpowering blast of ultimate pain, even just for a moment I wish for my body to be affected in some way by something. Thoughts descend into desires or impulses, both animalistic and vague, that cannot be acted upon, because I cannot do anything. I can no longer think and only know an unending lack of everything until the blasts of pain decide to return.